» Bullying Prevention

Bullying Prevention Information

Bully’s are primarily concerned with their own pleasure :

- Bullies want power over others

- Bullies are willing to use and abuse other people to get what they want

- Bullies are likely insecure

- Bullies find it difficult to see things from someone else’s point of view

Why Do Bullies Bully?

- They are angry

- They may have been bullied in the past, and are finding someone to punish

- A medical condition

- Peer pressure

- Low self esteem, or on a “power trip”

- Are they aware of their aggressive behaviour? Maybe they aren’t aware of this unacceptable behaviour. This is an excellent example why immediate intervention is required so the bully gets the message loud and clear of what’s right and wrong.

- Influence of watching too many violent movies, video games

- Lack of adult supervision and role modeling

- Poor home environment where drugs, alcohol abuse etc are taking place.

Bullies need to know and understand the harm they cause.

Bullies need to be shown that their behaviour will not be tolerated, especially at school where many schools have a ‘zero tolerance’ policy.

The Victim may not want to report what is happening to them.

- They are afraid of retaliation

- It’s embarrassing for some

- They don’t know if anyone will help them or the situation

- They may have told a parent or teacher in the past but the adult didn’t respond favourably

- They may have felt judged, weak or “like a baby”

When we do nothing about it, it shows we either don’t care or don’t feel its important to deal with.

Bullying Strategies for the School

- Lay the foundation of healthy citizens in your classrooms. If a child feels like they belong, they are safe, and are valued, they are more likely to make friends instead of giving everyone a hard time. Remember these are children trying to find their place in this world. Often they are hurting and frustrated and just need an adult to show them some positive attention.

- Incorporate values such as our 7 Grandfather Teachings…have examples and discussion surrounding each teaching. Provide role playing and role reversal activities so they learn empathy. Involve the elders and positive role models in your community to be involved.

- Keep a journal in the office to keep track of the bullying incidents. This way parents and teachers can see the complaints are legitimate, and are being followed up. It’s not easy for parents to admit their child may be the bully and will try to blame others.

- Be sure consequences are set up to deal with bullying incidents in a consistent fashion.

- Make the consequences fair for everyone, being careful not to show more support for one over the other. Remember we are dealing with emotions of children, not just punishment.

- Set up peer mediation in the schools. Even if formalized training for mediators is not possible, having your peers learning basic skills would be helpful for not just students, but the teachers as well.

Bulling Strategies for the Victim

- Most important - tell someone!

- Stick up for your friends and they’ll stick up for you.

- Don’t take it personally that someone is doing this to you. Remember that the bully is theproblem. It’s unfortunate and unfair that they are picking on you, but they have the problem.

- Inform teachers, a friend, parent, the police, a friend’s parent, your coach…

- Walk to school with friends.

- Don’t walk alone if you feel you may see the bully.

- Avoid the bully. Your true friends will play with you even if the bully tells them not to.

- In a safe area with others around, you could tell the bully that his actions hurt your feelings, and he shouldn’t talk to you like that.

- Understand its really hard to be brave when you are scared, or when you feel like no one in your class likes you. Lots of others students like you, but they may be afraid of the bully too!

- Remember you can’t change others but we can change ourselves. That means walk tall, don’t slouch, be confident, be positive and the bully may just see that he can’t get to you and that he can’t take your power away from you.

Bullying Strategies for the Bystander

- Tell an adult you trust what is going on or what you’ve just seen or heard.

- Stick up for those who are getting picked on. There are strength in numbers.

- Tell the bully he is hurting the other kids in your class for what he’s doing.

- Don’t encourage aggressive behaviour, like when a fight is taking place, don’t cheer anyone on, and don’t just watch it happen. Do something to make it stop.

- Practice being a good person to others. You never know when you may need someone to help you out.

Bulling Strategies for Parents/Caregivers

- Lay the foundation for a healthy child by teaching them how to be a good person, respect others and their property, how to be honest, how to be brave in difficult times, and teach them what compassion is.

- Keep track of what is going on in the school. Understand what the school policies are for bullying.

- Support your child if or when they come to you looking for help. They are hurting and are looking at you to guide them.

- Listen and encourage them to talk about the issues.

- Be a positive role model. If you child sees aggressive behaviour at home, they are likely to project that same aggressive behavior onto others.

- Set curfews, make reasonable chores, set up consequences when the rules are broken, and be consistent.

- Discourage teasing, rough play, violent games and movies, gossiping and neglecting others.

- Encourage the kids to involve everyone in their after school play time.

Studies show that 1 in 4 children who bully as a child will have a criminal record by age 30. If the behaviour isn’t stopped, the violence increases and we end up with school shootings, suicide, alcohol/drug abuse, unhealthy relationships and then they become adults and continue this behaviour in their own relationships.